In the name of God, the most merciful
I wanted to start this piece with “in the name God, most merciful, most awesome”, but then love in my heart whispered to my mind, “really Lings? God has a name? Merciful? Why?”. Recently my understanding of God has changed. I no longer believe in a God that has human emotions, I realized that the main stream understanding of God is a product of the human mind. The conception that God gets angry, runs some sort of merit system, punishes natural behavior like sex with fires of hell, and awards those that obey with virgins in heaven, is by my standards ridiculous.
Don’t get me wrong I’m nowhere near becoming an atheist. I still believe in God, just not in the conventional sense. Ironically, the incident that triggered this change was the latest violence in Gaza. I was very angry at what happened in Gaza. So angry, that i wondered how does such injustice take place. I sat and thought about the Palestinian conflict with the barbaric bastards with dangerous technologies, like I never did before.
Stuck in my head like a broken record was the question why? How does such a supreme entity allow such injustice?. I discarded my anger, took a deep breath, it felt like I was about to commit a crime. I abandoned the merciful God that is so bothered about sexuality. I detached from the love of God the savior, and gave up on the equally heroic Krishna. I told myself, the creator cannot be any of those; God is too awesome for all of that.
Deep in me, a sincere thought occurred, and I assure no devil or angel planted this into my mind. It was the same faculty that made sense of what infinity is, the same faculty that gasped what is happening in Palestine, the same faculty that my life depends on every second. A thought so honest, so simple that it has always been there, but somehow I failed to acknowledge it. Maybe I’ve been looking in the wrong places?
The holy scriptures, scriptures that a self-obsessed God inspired to save mankind. That doesn’t even make any sense, why did I look for God in scriptures? I had the stars, the moon, and the whole universe in the sky, but why did I look down into books? Why did I allow tales of fallen angels heaven and hell which I cannot bear witness to guide my decisions in life? Why was I so afraid to look into my soul for God?
Amazingly I felt peace, which was the moment I actually understood God the infinite, the everlasting, the most natural, the honest mind defying truth. God does exist; evidence of God is all around us, asking for one is like asking for evidence of oxygen. What happened in Gaza is of oppression, God is no human persona to have any judgment on it, and neither did God plan the death of those women and children. We are responsible for what happened in Gaza. We allowed the bastards to oppress; we did nothing to stop them.
Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We prayed for God to save Gaza, the heroic merciful omniscience King in heaven that allowed that outrage to happen in the first place. I wonder why that made any sense at all. I had enough of all that nonsense. It does not matter to me what your sexual orientation is or who you fornicate with, or what you pray to. There is something seriously wrong with humanity, and it needs rectification.
Individually, we can’t do much, but in solidarity we can change the world. Gaza marks a spiritual revolution in me. I have restructured my goals in life now. Religion is of no importance to me now; I understand life as it is. I have come to realize that the greatest evil of the 21st century are entities that run organized religion, corporations, and governments. I no longer live to escape hell, or attain nirvana; I have decided to do all I can to help bring justice to the oppressed.